Ode to a Friend

 



This is just too beautiful not to share...

 

just so you know

... i already got a grade for my "inc" subject...!!! (funkydance)

so now, i have 18 units of my grad program under my belt. with a gwa of 1.375 (woot) to boot.

all those sleepless nights, hair-pulling and teeth clenching moments paid off. *whew*



*******


i'm feeling restless again.

"shouldn't there be more?"

plateau.

falling.

scrambling for a hand hold.

looking.

searching...

i am so ENGAGED...

not with anybody in particular, but with life in general...

life is good and i'm loving it... yeah! rock on!! hahahaha


*******

for the sake of posterity, i'm gonna relay here the events of the past week which will forthwith be known as "Brownies and Valentines Week"...

Day 1: Sunday
- Lunch with Library Dood (LD)... had to rise to the challenging message about eye contact and missing you/missing me connotations... :P
- Dinner with the girls at Afrique's. Menu: triple mushroom pizza, ozzo buco with tomato sauce, meatball pasta... great catching up with the girls and office gossip (nahaha). set date for next saturday night out.

Day 2: Monday
- Lunch with Tygger-kun... unexpected visit... Menu: sisig and boneless bangus... hmmmnnn not bad... will definitely try the sisig again... :D

Day 3: Tuesday
- Dinner with BFF... after waiting almost an hour! held on to patience thinking that she needed a little slack considering her dilemma... Buto't Balat menu: sisig meal, pork barbeque, and salted egg salad... only the salted egg passed... yikes!

Day 4: Wednesday
- got stuck with checking time logs... annoying payroll preparation...
- made first batch of brownies... packed some for the BBF and BFF...

Day 5: Thursday
- Brownie points success!
- Waited over an hour for BFF... really irritating how she keeps me waiting. helped carry the groceries though... that appeased me, somewhat.
- pizza experiment at home with the BFF and BBF... nacho pizza!!!
- Baked second batch of brownies... for bragging purposes... bwahahahah

Day 6: Friday
- raincheck on BBF movie date... waiting for a good romantic movie...
- Family dinner... repeat of pizza experiment: bacon and tomatos, tuna and mushroom melt... yummy... nacho pizza is now officially on the specialty list... lol

Day 7: Saturday (Valentines Day)
- walk about at SM city (can't remember when i last went) and met LD while waiting for the girls...
- Tijuana! menu: tijuana special pizza, chips, fries, cheesesticks, Latino Fire... who say's a group date doesn't count as a celebration of Valentines???!!
- official singles group now known as: Tropang Latino Fire (care of DD)... hahahaha open for membership, next meeting M's b-day on Mar 6... lol

Day 8: Sunday
- full circle... took day off to make brownies for LD...
- met highschool peeps at Rob and inadverdently got invited to LD's house... wahahahaha life is funny!



needless to say... i had a blast and hit my target of topping last years Valentine's social calendar... wooohooo!!



*******


here's a little something from brother utoy's blog, a quote from Fr. Pedro Arrupe, SJ:



"Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is,
than falling in Love in a quite absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination, will affect everything.
It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you will do with your evenings,
how you will spend your weekends,
what you read, who you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in Love, stay in Love
and it will decide everything."


:D

Its Complicated

ito ang relationship status na pinaka asam-asam ko... alam ko hindi maganda ang connotation nito... its either bawal na pag-ibig, bigu, o katupakan lang talaga ang sitwasyun mo kapag ganito ang status message mo...

pero kasi, nag promise ako sa sarili ko na mag change stat ngayong araw ng mga puso... may deadline kasi. dapat married na ako by age 28... so kahit man lang sa guniguni ko pagbigyan na ninyo...

nasa "in relationship" na ako ngayon, by saturday, february 14, 2009... "engaged" na yan!! oh ha!! ang saya ng lola... sa birthday ko: "married"!! at pagka tapos nun... "its complicated" nah!! (evilsmirk) bwahahahaha

magiging eventful talaga ang 2009 ko... lol



*******


on a more serious note...

may i-share akong txt message (oo! buhay na nmn ang txt life ko.. wak kayong magulo! bleh!) galing sa peborit txtmate ko... well, s'ya lang nmn kausap ko araw-araw at gabi-gabi, basta lang hindi maubos ang load at mawalan ng baterya ang tupakin kong selepon...

eto ang sabi nya: "sang may ubra na, pauna una kuwa wallet bayad bills. sang may nobya kag asawa na, padamo damo na rason indi kaupod."

(ng may trabaho na, pasikat labas ng wallet mauna magbayad ng bill. ng may nobya't asawa na, paramihan na ng rason na hindi makasama.)

napatawa talaga ako... sa isip ko lang, this sums up our generation quiet nicely! hahahahaha


*******

FYI...

natandaan pa ba ninyo si Prayer? yung secret textmate ko... well... na upgrade na ang status n'ya... officially: STALKER na sya!!!

kainis!!! ayaw magpakilala pero kng ano anong detalye alam sa buhay ko!!!

pwes!!! jan ka sa sulok! kala mo mag-rereply pa'ko sa'yo....

eto sa'yo!!

09107827926 -----> pinamimigay ko ang number na to... naghahanap ng katinuan yan.. so pwede n'yong asarin ng todo!!

BWAHAHAHAHAAHHA

apathy

lahat ng tao ay naguguluhan at nai-stress sa kani-kanilang buhay... pero ako... parang wala akong naramdaman... out of touch at out of reach ata ang stress detectors ko.


pero ang hindi maganda... nawawalan nmn ako ng gana.


sa skul, sa trabaho, sa blog, sa plurk, at sa lahat nlng... pinipilit ko lang... (tulad ngayon... nakiki-type lng po ang alter ego ko...)


minsan naitanong ko kng bakit ako ganito ngayon... pero hindi tumatagal nawawala nmn sa isip ko... at kawalan nga ang tanging namamalagi dito...


wala lng... talagang wala lng talaga...



*******



"Apathy can be overcome by enthusiasm, and enthusiasm can be aroused by two things: first, an idea which takes the imagination by storm; and second, a definite, intelligible plan for carrying that idea into action. " — Arnold Toynbee


but i don't much care if i get cured of this...


"The only people who can ever put ideas into context are people who don't care; the unbiased and apathetic are usually the wisest dudes in the room. If you want to totally misunderstand why something is supposedly important, find the biggest fan of that particular thing and ask him for an explanation. He will tell you everything that doesn't matter to anyone who isn't him. He will describe paradoxical details and share deeply personal anecdotes, and it will all be autobiography; he will simply be explaining who he is by discussing something completely unrelated to his life." — Chuck Klosterman




*******



peborit animal ko ngayon... si Ulang ang Gumagawa ng Wala...







(basahin nyo ang orange book ni bob ong...andun s'ya.)

dot dot dot

photo by Victor Nuno


when this year started, i never imagined how it would all turn out. i remembered feeling optimistic and excited about it (near euphoria truth be known)... and now that it's coming to an end, i feel a little bit nostalgic. it has been an eventful year. and ironically still, this has been a most boring christmas for me. maybe that's just the universe telling me to slow down a bit, eh?



december 24...

• regular work day for me. busy, lots of people coming in and out of my office since it was pay day and people were getting their payslips. prepared some documents that the boss didn't get to sign (too late).
• got sentimental at the thought of not having any celebration at home. almost bawled my eyes out while chatting with joy.
• had my sister come pick me up at the office so we could have dinner out. just the two of us at home. she came just in time to cheer me up.
• dropped by Jet's and had dinner with him too. yeay! that was a high point. and... i saw eX3. woow! that was cool! chatted for a while and then went home.
• my sister went to mass with her bf so i went to bed early. slept through christmas countdown...

december 25...

• woke up around 9 am and had raisin bread, scrambled eggs, spaghetti (from the cousins next door), and coffee for breakfast.
• watched 4 episodes of prisonbreak's season 3 (care of good ol' Jet)
• noon time i had to prepare to go home to roxas. the bus "konduktor" asked, "studyante, miss?" wahahahahahaha oh boy! that made my day alright! that and the cute guy across the aisle looked up to see my answer. (lol) he went off at Passi... tsk tsk tsk... too bad.
• spent the 3 hours travel time watching Mummy 1 and half of Mummy 2 (Scorpion King). had a good laugh at least.
• arrived at Gramma's hungry and headachey. lunch was lechon and bread, with a banana for dessert... at 4:50 in the afternoon... sweet!
  

... and spent the next two and half days lazing around my Gramma's house watching tv, playing computer games, reading, and getting my fingertips blistered practicing "is it okay if i call you mine" on the guitar...


*******


while at my Gramma's i had a couple of alleluia moments.

i realized that i had grown away from their tight little world. their life revolved around their daily routine. and they had no other concern except that they be able to keep their delicate bubble of self-righteous contentment. they talk of events and grudges that happened over a year ago like it was just yesterday. they count the centavos and pesos that they spent over the blessings and people that they could make happy. they remember the bitter and acrid taste of insults over the sweet smiles and sincere thank yous that they encounter...

it makes me sad. and it made me understand them a little bit better. but it also scared me. because i knew that their way of life could as easily be mine and that their pessimistic and self-righteous words could still seep into my heart like slow poison...


*******

back at home.

everyone's excited about the new year. there's going to be a neighborhood party. thanksgiving mass, gift-giving for the children...

aaah, this is the spirit of christmas i'd been missing. the willingness to share, even from those with so little. yes... it gives me hope...

a fitting end to the old year. and a welcome beginning for the new one.

Anti-Social Tendencies

Last night, I went home to find that there wasn't dinner on the table.

Iloy: Di mo nakuha ang text ni Eron? Di kami nagluto.

Ako: Ano?! Eh ano kakainin ko?!

Iloy: Kala ko nakuha mo ang text?!

Ako: Aaaarrggghh!!! Obviously wala!

[walk-out]

I went out and texted everyone I could think of who would accompany me for dinner and may be spend the night with. I was so angry, I didn't want to go back home at all!

Turns out, all my friends where unavailable or totally unresponsive... ggrrrrr!!


NOTE TO SELF: Get a boyfriend... ASAP!



*******

But not just any male. I do have some standard to uphold. I've been waiting too long to just settle for any guy, thank you very much.


Boyfriend Checklist:

1. Someone who can commit with me wholeheartedly. I'm not gonna make you complete or you me. 'Cause, honey, we already are.

2. Accepts me for who I am. Read: someone who won't mind if I turn into my maldita alter ego...!

3. Makes demands of me without breaking my spirit. I want to be challenged but not dictated to.

4. Can make me laugh, and can talk sense. Preferably loves music and books, or at the very least has an opinion on it.

5. Respects and is kind to women, children, and animals. Patience is a virtue best displayed in these attributes and in the face of crying babies and toddlers throwing tantrums.

6. Must have a hobby (or interest) of some sort. I find that people with no hobbies can be boring. They have a tendency to take things for granted - no passion for anything...

7. Knows how to ride public transport and can handle getting lost in a new environment. Really, dude, i need a man with a good sense of survival.

8. Is able to disclose and be honest about anything... but also knows how to shut up at the appropriate time.



Disclaimer: This list can and may change at the whims and needs of yours truly.

Barkada All Nighter!

DATE: November 30 to December 1

VENUE: May's

MENU:
1. Tuna and mushroom pasta
2. Mr. Chips with Tostitos cheese dip
3. French bread with 5 spreads: black & white choco, crunchy peanutbutter, orange marmalade, strawberry jam, cheesewiz
4. Mantikado de Casuy ice cream
5. Choco-chip cookies, brownies, and mango bars
6. Cold past (left-over), scrambled eggs, hotdogs
7. Bean sprouts, kalubay, and ground beef
8. Greek salad (cucumber, greens, olives, feta chees, ham, tomatoes, with italian dressing) with multi-grain bread on the side
9. Iced tea, coke, and sprite

DISCUSSION:
1. Relationships
2. Movies
3. Work
4. School
5. Reunion
6. Food
7. Technology
8. Reminisce
9. Others (can't remember over the noise of laughter and much banter)

MOVIE RUN:
1. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
2. Dogma
3. Love and Other Disasters
4. Lost in Austen (1st epi)
5. Russion Dolls (sequel of the Spanish Apartment)

SNAPSHOTS:




REVIEWS:

DESA: "What did you put with the cream of mushroom? All purpose cream?"

KHRYSTELLE: " How was the get together?" (absent)

ELLEN: "Thanks guid for your friendship. Enjoy guid ko with you guys."

JET: " ... had one of the best times. Thanks"

MAY: [Planning the next barkada gathering: Dec 20, 21, and 27-29.]

*******

This is fast becoming a tradition!

See you guys!

(^_~))

Bookworm and proud of it!

I am a lover of books and I absolutely love to read. One of my earliest happy memory was when our grade one class was given the tour of the school library and I saw rows and rows of books, some shelves even shielded from grubby hands behind sheets of plastic. I remember lagging behind the class so I could browse the shelves and touch the spines of those beautiful volumes that were out of my reach until the third grade when we were allowed to get a library card.

And I remember one of the few instances when I got scolded in class. It wasn’t because I was talkative, or “pasaway”. It was because I got caught reading a library book, hidden below my desk, during my English class. I was in third grade.

My love story with the book is ultimately intertwined with school and the people I interact with every day. At kinder school I thrived on picture books and those how-things-work science volumes sold by door to door salesmen; at grade school was my Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, and Bobsy Twins phase which later evolved into the Mills & Boon and Harlequin romance affair generously sprinkled with literary anthologies along the way. At high school I got heavily involved with Judith McNaught, Brenda Joyce, Iris Johansen, and all those other leading romance novelist. I also got my first taste of fantasy fiction with Robert Silverberg’s Lord Valentine’s Castle and Elizabeth Pope’s Perilous Gard, and got interested in psychology with William Sleator’s House of Stairs (heavy on behaviorism).

I could lose my self in a book. My classmates would all be talking and arguing but I could sit at my corner and never hear a sound.

When I reached college I got a little bit refined and read some classics: Shakespeare, Milton (I tried but never finished Paradise Lost), Edgar Allan Poe (one of my favorite), Jane Austen (before the movie commercialized her works), and other authors I could find in the library. I would max out my borrowers limit and gorge myself on weekends. Sadly, I never got around to finishing some of them because there were also text books that needed reading.

Trivia: I once heard it bandied about that there was a copy of the Kama Sutra in the reserved section of our library. This was in first year while taking a World History class. Our professor disabused us of the idea that the classic tract was only good for lewd drawings on sexual positions. Of course I had to find out if indeed we had a copy. I looked up the card catalogue and lo and behold it was indeed part of the collection. I surreptitiously traced the books at the reserved section but it was no longer there. *Think: Nicolas Cage at the Library of Congress looking for the President’s Book.*

Anyway, back to my timeline. It was also in college that I started buying books. I would carefully save my holiday “earnings” and splurge on second hand book shops. There was this nice shop at Gaisano City once. I remember it because that’s where I bought my three-in-one copy of Anne MacCaffrey’s Harper Hall Trilogy, hard-bound, which was later borrowed and never returned by a dorm-mate (I want to hunt him down still, “Kuya Niel Puga, give ‘em back!” huhuhuh). It was also where I found - and didn’t buy - Frank Herbert’s God Emperor of Dune (which is so hard to find now) and a paperback copy of Perilous Gard. Those were losses I suffer up to this day.

When I got work, and steady income, I gradually built up my SF collection. Sometimes I’d buy books I wouldn’t read. With work-related stress weighing on me, sometimes I’d much rather sleep than read. I’d occasionally read the romance novels my aunt gave me for pasalubong though: Nora Roberts! But it was also through my aunt that I discovered Neil Gaiman and Sharon Shinn, two of my favored authors to this day. My older brother introduced me to Orson Scott Card and William Gibson. Pol introduced me to Pol Medina and I heard about Bob Ong from my barkada.

I found that my family and friends were becoming my trusted sources of reading materials as my professional endeavor limited my time from browsing book shops. I’d visit May, a high school barkada, and come home with a huge bag full of cook books and contemporary novels; I’d visit my grandparents for the holidays and come home with books from my aunt. I’d swap books with my siblings and friends, never minding who owned which books and sometimes forgetting who borrowed my Neil Gaiman (Rolan are you reading this??). From my working sphere I was exposed to Stephen Covey and Don Miguel Ruiz and of course Mel, my source for Sandman and other comic books. And now that I’m back at school, my classmates have let me borrow their copies of Mitch Albom.

My love and respect for books have grown through out every phase of my life. Now, I’m trying to share that passion with my friends. But it’s so hard to find people who have the same interest. Most people nowadays are reliant on ebooks and soft copies, dvds, and internet downloads for entertainment. They’re quiet useful, I admit, but still nothing beats handling an old and yellowing “volume of forgotten lore”. And it’s so much harder to find people who are generous with their treasures.

If you’re within my vicinity and have the same passion with books as I do, please let me know and I’ll gladly share my library with you. We can discuss and share thoughts on what we’ve read, reread, rated, hated, loved, and treasured. Who knows, we’ll be able to create our very own Bookworm Haven right here in our own corner of the blogosphere.

(^_~)

Guest Post: "Langaw"

MGA KWENTONG DUBAI Episode 1
Ukol sa Totoong Karanasan ni Codename: TASUKI
Unang nabasa sa BarkadaAdvisory YahooGroup, May 24, 2006
*******

LANGAW

Dito sa Dubai, di na uso ang daga, ipis, langaw, lamok at langgam dahil malinis ang paligid. Isang araw nang pauwi na ako, sumabay ako sa bus ng aking cliente. Sa lood ng bus, nag-iisa lang akong Pinoy. Lahat puro Pana, Langka at Patan (Indian, Sri Lankan and Pakistani). Bigla na lang akong nagulat nang may nakita akong langaw na lumilipad. Akalain mo nga naman, sa loob ng isang buwan kong pag-iikot, nakakita din ako ng langaw. Ang sikat na langaw ay walang ibang dinapuan kungdi ang inyong abang lingkod. Naisip ko tuloy, siguro nga dito sa Dubai ang mga mababango lang ang dinadapuan ng langaw. O di kaya, Pinoy din ang langaw at natuwa sya nang nakita nya ang kanyang kababayan.

Based on my true experience… igalang ang Copyrights.





*******


Tungkol kay Codename: TASUKI:

Isang kabarkada mula ng hayskul. Kasalukuyang naghahasik ng lagim at magandang amoy sa bansa nang Dubai. Ang financier nang barkada sa christmas parti kahit man sya ay present o hindi. Kelangan lang padalhan nang proweba nang tamang paggamit ng kanyang kontribusyun kahit na picture lang ng aming mga paa suot ang biniling medyas para makapag-bowling! I tell you sinulit namin ang pinadala nyang pera. Exhibit A:






Bakit Tasuki? Kasi mahilig sya sa anime at peborit nya ang karakter ni Tasuki sa Fushigi Yuugi. Yun lang po at wala na talaga syang maalalang magandang pen name.. nyahahaha.

Abangan ang susunod na kabanata!

:D

Student na po!

Officially got enrolled today. Back to school na naman sa Sabado. Ano na naman kaya ang mga bagong kaalamang masasagap ko sa mga propesor at kaklase ko? I’m so excited! Weeeh!

Pero. Meron akong sabit sa nakalipas na term. May incomplete ako. *huhuhuh* For the first time in the history of my academic life I received an “INC” rating. Kahit ako man ay hindi makapaniwala na nakatanggap ako ng markang ganito. Sa totoo lang, nung undergrad pa lang ako, super-praning ata ako sa pagsubmit nang mga requirements, assignments at projects, pagkuha nang quizzes, long exams at finals, paglahad nang research at reports. Halos hindi ako makatulog kapag alam kung meron akong gawaing pang-skwela na hindi ko tinatapos… Pero ngayong nasa grad skul na, at sariling sikap ang pag-ipon nang pang-tuition, ay dito naman ako nakakuha nang kumpyansa na magmaktol sa klase at hindi magsubmit ng requirements.

Isa-isahin natin. May dalawang final paper na kaylangang tapusin sa panghapon kung klase. Ito ay (una) mag-interview, mangalap nang impormasyun, at gumawa ng assessment sa isang guidance program sa isang napiling hayskul, at (pangalawa) gumawa nang training needs assessment nang mga guidance counselors sa lungsod nang Iloilo. Dahil nga groupwork ito minabuti naming tatlong magkakasama na hatiin ang paggawa nang final output. Magsi-email nalang nang mga nagawa para hindi na kaylangan mag-meet.

Ngunit, maglilimang lingo na at hindi pa rin namin natatapos kahit man lang draft ng mga ito. Reverse social loafing ata ang nangyari dito. Tsk! Dahil alam naming hindi naman ginagawa nang bawat isa ang mga nakatokang gawain ay mistulang tinamad narin kaming tuunan ito nang pansin. Haaay!

Natatandaan ko pa ng kapanahunan sa kolehiyo na nag pwamis kay Lord na hindi na, at hindi na magkaka-cram sa tuwing magtapos ang semester at nakahilira na ang sandamakmak na deadlines at exams… Waaaah! Those were the days na hindi ko na gusto maulit pa!

Pero, ok narin ito kahit papano. Kasi ngayon ko lang nalaman na kapag pala “INC” ang grade mo, may isang taon ka para maka-comply sa requirements mo. Bakit ba walang may nagsabi nito sakin nang college pa ako???!!! Di sana, may alebyo ang nerbyus ko tuwing magkaharap kami ni Mr. Cram at Ms. Puyat. Di sana nakatikim ako nang tinatawag na social life at gimik. Di sana, di sana… hindi pa ako nakatapos ngayon! *wahahahaha*

Ay ewan… Matatapos naman namin ito (I hope!). Pero ngayon pasalamat na akong nakapag-enroll na! Bagong simula, ika nga…

At para may proweba, at souvenir narin, ito ang pictures!

Sunday Crisis

I feel like I’m in the midst of an identity crisis. Bombarded by too much information, examples, and suggestions I am overwhelmed by the options open to me. But then, I received a text message from my cousin, Ruth. This is what it said: “The highest courage is to dare to be yourself in the face of adversity. Choosing right over wrong, ethics over convenience, and truth over popularity. These are the choices that measure our life. Travel the path of integrity without looking back, for there is never a wrong time to do the right thing.”

Hmmnn… as usual she didn’t put the author. This irritates me no end. It rubs against my strict scholarly training on responsible authorship. What else could I do? Google it, of course.

Unfortunately, this proved to be a little harder than I originally thought. I found 10,400 hits on it and the first page did no more than give me links to citations, lists of unlabeled quotes, a mission statement of a pool company, and one article that tagged it with “Unknown” author. Too much for one person already bombarded by too much information. So I dropped it. Let it be tagged: Anonymous. (nyahahaha)

Enough digression. Where was I? Oh yes, identity crises. Now, there I was, mulling over the text message when it suddenly occurred to me. I don’t have to change anything. I just have to be myself! (grin)

So instead of worrying over changing my blog title, I just have to put in a description. Give it a little bit of focus. That’s it, and no more. Yeay!

Look up, guys. Here’s to me! :D

*******
I actually wrote an article yesterday but unfortunately I can’t transfer the darned file ‘cause I don’t have an extra USB to use. The one I’ve been using was my brother’s Sony Walkman thingie and I’d already returned it to him. My dad’s USB was with him since his Acer was with me (nyahah!), so that leaves me with nothing, nada! Man, I really have to buy me one of those things!

And thanks to Danny for the picture... :D

The Weight Issue

Last Friday, I happened to meet a friend of mine at the mall. She complimented me on my corporate get up (no one is used to me dressing up it seems), but then she also said:

Nice: Pol, nag-niwang ka guid man. (Pol, you’ve really grown thin.) *fixing my necklace and smoothing my hair away from my shoulders*

Me: Not you, too. *looks at her weird*

I met my cousin last night while I was walking along Valeria Street to my jeepney stop. Of all the things she said to me, this is what I remember.

Ida: Caz, nagniwang ka na! (Caz, you’re so thin!) *grabs me by the arms*

Me: Wala ah. Sus! *peeved*

It was dark and I was wearing a black skirt and blazer.



This morning, one of my friends dropped by the office. I asked him to apply with the company and he was scouting the area so to speak. Again he mentions the state of my body weight:

Daniel: Ganiniwang ka na di. (You’re getting thin here.)

Me: Indi, ah. Wala ko bi day-off… hahaha. (Not really. I just don’t have days-off.)

It’s not true of course. I do have my day-off every Saturday. But, I also go to grad school. So…

Maybe I lost a couple of pounds but I am not on a diet and neither am I trying to be thin! Aaaargh!

After lunch today, while walking back to my office, I met an old schoolmate from college:

Raincel: Nag-sexy ka na guid. Maintain ang figure. *admiring glance* (You’re so sexy. You’ve maintained your figure.)

Me: Haha. Why, thank you. Tanan na lang naghambal nagniwang ko. (Everyone’s been saying I’m so thin.)

Raincel: Indi ah. Daw pareho ma lang sang college ta. (Not really. Just the same as when we were in college.)

Me: Amo mana gani hambal ko. (That’s what I’ve been saying all along. )

Ha! I told you I'm not thin! So, there!

Tall Order

I have an anonymous text-friend. Sa dialect: txtm8.

I don’t know his name, age, address, profession, or even how he got my number. But, because he piqued my interest and gave me stimulating intellectual discussion (Read: He has a lot of ideas I enjoy dissecting and contradicting.) I decided not to zap him with my deadly sarcasm and instead gave him the chance to bask in the light of my wisdom.

This decision did not disappoint me. I found him to be a good grinding stone on which I could sharpen my resolve on a few beliefs and clarify uncertainties on several points. Not to mention the fact that I derive immense satisfaction in donning my Scary-Strong-Woman persona when I talk to him. (hihihi)

In fact, here are my thoughts and reactions to our discourse on relationships, love, and commitment:

1. You don’t fall in love unknowingly. Pero tamad at duwag lang talaga ang tao, some can’t take responsibility for themselves kaya nirarason na lang kung ano-ano.

2. Lumalabas ang pagiging psychologist ko at umiiral ang cognitive-affective leanings ko when I talk about human behavior during what most romantically refer to as “being in love” or “falling out of love”. Take the following statements he sent me:

a. “Feelings change”: TRUE
b. “Sometimes no matter how much you stop the feeling it just grows stronger. You just can’t deny or take for granted what you really feel.”: FALSE (boo!)

3. People make mistakes when they give in to their weakness. Kaya, naghahanap ako ang lalaking matatag din sa puso at isipan. May nahanap at nakilala na akong mga lalaking ganito. Kaya nga lang ay may mga pag-ibig na sa buhay at kailangang respetuhin ang kanilang choice.

4. People who don’t know, not to mention like themselves, generally don’t know how to accept, let alone love, other people. Ika nga, “You can’t give what you don’t have.”

5. Idealist ako when it comes to the subject of love and commitment. Trust, honesty, and respect are words you have to learn and live by when you go into any relationship. Take note, this is true for all relationships.

6. I fervently believe that relationships can only work with a lot of hard work. It’s not always pretty, happy, or agreeable. It takes conscious effort, a lot of appreciation, compromise, and less whining, criticism, and excuses.

7. Wala akong pasensya sa mga taong kayang ipagtanggol ang sarili nila by just saying “I couldn’t help it. ‘Di ko mapigilan ang sarili ko.” Wattah!

8. Kung kaya nang lalaki maging taksil, kaya rin ni babae. Mas socially acceptable lang ang una kesa sa pangalawa. At karamihan sa mga lalaki ay hindi ito kayang tanggapin o aminin. Mas mainam na makahanap nang lalaking alam ito, para hindi siya magkamaling i-take for granted ang pagtingin ni babae.

Hmmnn… I’m getting all worked up. Eto na lang. Kung interesado kayong maki-txt sa anonymous friend ko narito and ilang detalye tungkol sa kanya: (veracity unknown)

· Ang pangalan niya sa phonebook ko ay “Prayer”. He used to send me prayers
during the first month he txted me. Walang palya, kaya yun na ang pinangalan ko sa kanya.

· He’s a he. Nabisto ko siya nang muntik na akong awayin nang magpasaring akong baka me boyfriend s’ya. Buti na lang at dinaan niya sa tawa. (hyuk hyuk hyuk) Guys are so predictable when their manhood is threatened. Tsk!

· He lives and works in Iloilo. Sa Miagao ang hometown niya.

· May girlfriend siya pero nag-break na raw sila. (?)

· Hindi ko gusto ang choice niya nang forwarded txt joke na una niyang binigay sakin. Doon ko nasigurado na lalaki nga siya. Read between the lines.

· He doesn’t want to give me his name so I have a dark suspicion that I know or have met him somewhere. Mokong talaga!

· Ang cellphone number n’ya ay: 09107827926. Kung kilala niyo ang taong ito… regards na lang sa kanya. Nyahahaha.

I do wonder how I get these mysterious text friends. He’s actually the 3rd one whose exhibited similar beliefs about the subject. I find it irritating and sad at the same time that they could hold such misconceptions about things that I thought were so obvious. And all these texters arrived right after I broke up with my last boyfriend. What is it? Do I have a sign lit up across the universe that says “Recently broke-up. Ask about lessons learned from the experience”???

As if!

Break-up with your own boyfriend or girlfriend! Then invite me to talk about your experience!

>:p

Cardigan & Prose

Nung isang gabi nakita ko sa kwarto nakasabit ang bagong damit na pasalubong nang Tita ko ke youngest sister. Kaninang umaga sinuot ko ito with the intention of wearing it to work. Cute sana, bagay na bagay sa’kin pero sleeveless it. Bumaba ako at naghanap nang ipapares na blazer, jacket, o bolero. After trying on 9 different blazers and jackets, with my cousin and aunt giving me enthusiastic suggestions, I decided to change my outfit…

What the hell use are 9 blazers, jackets, and boleros when all you need is 1 black cardigan?!

Note to self: Buy black cardigan ASAP!!!! (grrrrr)

*******

Naiinis ako. Tanungin mo ako kung bakit, sige na.
Naiinis ako sa isang tao. Tatanungin mo ba kung sino?
Naiinis ako sa nangyari. Wag mo nang itanong at sasabihin ko!
I asked you out tonight. Walang reply, kahit isang txt man lang.
Alam mo namang nastress ako sa trabaho at kailangan kong makasama ka.
Pero nauna na naman ang trabaho mo. Ewan ba at baka rasun lang yan dahil may iba na.
Ano nga ba ako sa buhay mo? Hindi ka ba sigurado?
Ayaw mo akong masaktan pero paulit-ulit mo akong iniiwasan.
Tama na ang luha, tama na ang pag-iintindi.
Tama na ang “Salamat” na iyong sinabi.
Masakit aminin pero totoo nga kaya, na wala nang laman ang iyong mga sinasabi.

Nag-txt ka na naman. Tinatanong kung ok lang ako.
Kung pinaunlakan mo ako eh sana hindi mo na tinatanong yan.
Ang labo talaga nang mundong ginagalawan natin.
Nagkikita lang tayo sa kawalan nang internet, sa YM, o sa SMS.
Nakikihalubilo sa kapwa mga nawala o nawawala.
Tanging blog at online forum ang kinukunan nang inspirasyun.
Sana naman ay magtagpo na ang imahinasyun mo at pantasya ko.

Wag kang mag-alala wala akong hinahabol dito.
Sumusulat lang ako nang sinasaloob ko.
Ekpermento ito, tawag ay free association writing.
Kahit ako ay namangha sa mga salitang kusang namutawi sa aking screen.
Kung sino ka man, sana ay magpakilala kana.
Magpakita man lang kahit saglit lang.
Nang hindi naman masayang ang aking pinaghirapan.
At nang mapagtanto kong meron ngang taong tinutukoy dito.

(lol) Arnie, I thought I’d try my hand at song writing. Sorry at mejo prose lang ang kaya ko. Nyahahaha…

*******

Can somebody tell me how come I can't register my blog account through Word 2007? (annoyed) hhhrrrrr... access restriction ba ito?!

Enter: Taray Queen

I’ve been thinking of making over my blog-site. Change the name, look, etc… I think I’ve been Miss Goody-Goody for too long. I need to spice up my site and live up to my new reputation of being the resident HR of Plurklandia.

Maybe then I can command some respect with the Pikon and Bugnutin types. Hmmmn? What do you think?

New Blog Site Name: Taray Queen
Banner Intro: Constrained with the Truth but believing in the adage: “Don’t say anything if you can’t say anything nice.” Be warned. If I have nothing to say to you, take it as a compliment. :D

Makahingi na nga rin nang magandang picture kay Pot. Siguro yung mga Japanese masks na ginagamit nila sa kabuki play na nakasimangot. (nyahahaha) Pangtaboy ata ng mga evil spirits yun.


******


Noong isang gabi, habang nagsusulat ako nang blog update, nakinuod ako sa dalawa kung pinsan at kapatid nang dvd. Ang entertainment choice nila: The Prom. A slasher flick starred by Brittany Snow about a young girl fatally stalked by her teacher, killed her family and three years later is attending her senior prom. Predictably, the mad-stalker gets away from prison on the day of the prom and incidentally stayed at the same hotel they were holding the party.

I don’t know why my sister loves horror-suspense flicks, to tell you the truth. Nang dahil sa hilig n’ya nkapanood ako nang The Ring (Japanese & Hollywood version), The Grudge, Dark Water, The Eye, at kung ano-ano pang titulo nang Thai kulam movies (oo, meron sila nun! At nakakatakot talaga. Promise!). Personally, mas gusto ko yung mga feel good movies, especially kapag gabi na nanonood. Mas mahimbing naman ang tulog mo pagkatapos kapag masayahing pelikula ang pinapanood mo, diba? Diba?! Pero ewan dun!

Wala akong choice kasi ginawa nilang sleep-over camp ang bahay namin dahil nagbabakasyun ang magulang at nakababatang kapatid ko sa Lola namin. Kaming dalawa lang ng Sis sa bahay kaya minabuti nilang doon narin makikikain at makikitulog hanggang sa araw ng undas. (Ewan ko lng kung ano na naman ang panonoorin nila mamaya. Haayz!)

Hindi ko mapigilan, nakatutok din ang mata ko sa tv kahit na alam kong hindi ko lang magugustuhan ang makikita ko. Sinabihan ko na silang iba nalang ang panoorin pero ala talaga. Yun ang gusto nila. Syempre pa, puro lang habulan at saksakan at patayan ang nangyari sa pelikula. Tanong ko nga sa sarili ko, ano ba ang masaya dito at parang aatakihin lang ako sa puso nang lentik na pelikulang ito. (huhuhuh)

Nang matapos ang pelikula naghanap sila nang anime movie para mawala ang kaba nila. Malas at hindi gumana ang Get Backers. Sana nanood narin ako para mapawi ang nerbyos ko. Pero hindi, isa na namang suspense thriller ang gumana. Sus Maria! Tinapos ko nalang ang editing ko at umakyat sa kwartu.

Bahala kayo sa mga multo!

Blog ito para sa mga idol ko

Sa totoo lang mahina ako sa Pilipino. Sa totoo lang ito ang pinaka heyt kong subject nong elementarya at hayskul pa ako (buti na lang at wala nang Pilipino sa kolehiyo). Pero nang mabasa ko si Bob Ong nagbago ang lahat. At nang madiskubre ko ang mga Pinoy blogger sa internet, mas lalong nagliwanag ang aking mundo… ok, ok, erase that bit. Exaggeration na po ‘yan. Hindi naman ganun ka dilim sa sulok ko although, come to think of it, lumiwanag nga ito nang dahil sa mga nakilala ko sa Plurk.

Be that as it may, at coño na kung coño, magsasalita este magsusulat ako nang Pilipino para sa mga idol ko. Kung sino man kayo, eh, kayo na lang ang magdiskubre.

Ngayon, dahil ang pinaguusapan natin ay mga idol, let me tell you about my crush *kilig*. Teheh. Ang crush ko ay gwapo, magaling magsalita (at may laman din ang salita), may sense of humour, hindi takot sa libro, at may prinsipyu sa buhay. Ang tawag ko sa kanya ay si *drum roll please* Cute, Articulate Guy.

Ayan naaaninag ko na naman siya sa balintatanaw nang aking imahinasyun *kilig, kilig*. And the best part, alam n’yo kung ano..? He’s out of my reach! Bahahaha.

‘Wag kayong mag-alala, hindi pa ako nawawalan nang katinuan. Ang ibig lang sabihin n’yan ay walang pag-asa na maging kami at forever s’yang magiging crush ko! Weeeh!

Let me explain ang origin nang konseptong ito. Nung hayskul kami, ang bestfriend kong babae ay may crush na upper-classman. Gwapo, magaling magsalita, may sense of humour, hindi takot sa libro, at may prinsipyu sa buhay… teka nga, parang familiar ah… Ahehehe kaya pala magbestfriend kami. At sa atin lang, kung hindi niya una sinabi na crush niya si Kuya *toot* eh di sana hinayaan ko na rin ang sarili kong magkacrush dun. Hmmmnn, kaya lang survival rule ata nang best-friendship na huwag magkaroon nang crush sa iisang lalaki. At hindi pa pumapalya ang rule na ito at mag-bestfriend parin kami makalipas nang mahigit sampung taon.

Pero balik sa topic. So ang crush nang bestfriend ko ay walang malay sa HD niya mula nung first year kami (I think crush na niya yun first year palang) hanggang magtapos kami (or kung nalaman man ay ‘di na ito nagpahalata). Nagka-girlfriend na ito at nagkasama na kami sa kung ano-anong mga skul aktibitis at gimmick ngunit dihins niya ito ginawang rason para magtapat o magparamdam man lang nang sinasa loob niya. Pero, kung kami na ang mag-usap, naku po! Drama to the max! Ngunit agree kami sa isang bagay, masarap magka-crush kapag alam mong wala tsansang magi-evolve ito sa kung ano.

Paano, tanong niyo? Well, it’s so much better to have a crush when they don’t know! Kung nagka-alaman kaya eh ‘di nawala ang kilig, ang thrill, ang secret rush tuwing nasisilayan mo ang taong para sa iyo ay tanging rason bakit ang aga-aga mong gumigising kahit na walang flag ceremony from Tuesdays to Fridays.

Malas nga lang at wala akong taong kinababaliwan nung hayskul. Sayang, sana perfect attendance ako sa Chem class ko. Sana nabawasan ang mga class period na inuukol ko sa Chem stairs dahil hindi na pwede pumasok sa klase ni Ma’am Ibabao kapag ikaw ay nali-late. Haayz…

Ang ending? Sa kalagitnaan nang turbulent highschool life namin, may napagtanto akong ilang bagay na kahit ngayon ay nakatatak parin sa aking isipan. Ang mga ito ay: Una. Masarap tumambay sa Chem stairs kapag marami kayo, nakikiharutan at tsismisan kasama ang barkada. Pero hindi masarap kapag nag-iisa ka lang umupo dito dahil na-lock out ka sa klase mo. Pangalawa. May pakinabang naman pala ang crush (huwag kang maniwala sa nanay mo, ok lang magka-crush). Hindi totoong sa lahat nang pagkakataon ay makaka-sama ito sa pag-aaral mo. Gaya nang pag-avoid nang mga Chem stairs incident tulad nang nasabi sa itaas. Pangatlo, mainam magka-crush sa taong wala kang pag-asa dahil mas maliit ang tsansa na makakahalata siya o kung makahalata man ay wala siyang pakialam at most probably ay hindi ka pahihiyain.

O? say niyo? ‘Diba it makes sense? Kung hindi kayo convinced, alalahanin niyo nalang kung anong nangyari sa mga crushes niyo dati. Saan ba ang mas intense and feeling? Yung time na walang kaalam-alam ang crush mo o yung nalaman na niya? San ba ang mas enjoy? Yung bang tumatago ka sa restroom para masilip siya sa basketball court na nasa gilid nang building o yung time na iniiwasan mo siya dahil alam mong alam na niya? Hmmnn..?

At para sa Cute, Articulate Guy ko, kapag nakabisita ka sa blog ko, mabasa mo ito, at ma-gets mong ikaw nga ang tinutukuy ko, please lang, huwag mo nang ipahalata na alam mo. Para naman hindi ako mapilitang maghanap nang iba. Para naman mapahaba ko ang aking kilig moments tuwing ma-encounter kita. Yun lang hihingin ko. Ok na ako.

Hayaan mo na lang na maging crush kita.

Disclaimer: Dahil nga ito ay nasa Pilipino, hindi gumagana ang Spell Check o Grammar Check dito. Kaya pagpasensyahan niyo na kung merong mga salita na bago niyo lang ma enkwentru. Let’s just chalk it up to artistic license. Amin ko naman na hindi ako magaling sa Pilipino. :p

Snail Mail Gods, I Curse You!!

For us mere mortals, waiting for blessings from the gods can be quite excruciating. Added to which is the thoroughly inefficient mailing system in our beloved country.

I shouldn't be surprised I suppose, considering that with us, being late is as much a matter of national pride as it is a matter of record, infamy, and soul-cringing jokes. hrrrr...

They tell me that my check was mailed on October 14. However, when I inquired at the post office just this morning, the person in charge told me that it hasn't arrived yet. But, dig this, I overheard her on the phone reciting out loud the names and dates of persons whose registered mail have arrived. And she was citing days later than October 14. What the..!!!

Was is this?! Am I being targeted by the powers that be and my mail is being held back for reasons unknown??

Huhuhu... I've exhausted my resources and all I can do is wait and cross my fingers and toes hoping, hoping (!), that the mail will arrive today or sometime tomorrow...

Huwaaaah! pray for me!!!

Alien Froggy

My bestfriend gave me another addition to my frog collection, stuffed toy section... Aren't they cute!

Don't mind the mess, though. My room isn't that messy, I promise. There just doesn't seem to be enough room for my books, and papers, and clothes, and books... whoops! I'll shut up now.

My alien froggy is just begging to be let out of his isolation chamber, don't you think? (lol)

Revenge of the Rubik's

Nung nakaraang gabi may nakasabay ako sa jeep na lalaki na nagso-solve nang Rubik's. Nung una kong nakita, dalawang layer na ang natapos n'ya. So, sabi ko, "Ok! Alam n'ya pano magsolve. Di ko kelangan mag-ngitngit sa kakapigil sa sarili ko magturo." (Di naman halata na OC ako ano?)

Nakapuwesto ako sa likuran niya (nasa front seat yung mama) at ang magaling na driver nag-antay nang iba pang sasakay...

Di maiwasan, nakikita ko habang tini-twist n'ya ang cube. Pero habang nag-aabang nang pasahero yung driver, inaabangan ko narin kung pano niya inu-ulit-ulit ang sequence of moves na parang subra pa sa sirang plaka kaka-irita at kakahilong tingnan! Naman!

Nabuo, undo. Buo, undo. Buo, undo. Paulit-ulit! Hanggang umusad ang jeep makalipas ang sampung minuto! Parang sisigaw na ako na tatawa na sasabunutan ang sarili sa kakapigil sa sarili ko na 'wag (at 'WAG) akong maki-alam sa Rubik's nang iba!

Nag-text na ako sa kaibigan ko. Nanghingi nang moral support habang nagka-countdown ang mala-bombang timer nang katinuan ko!

Huhuhuhu.. Torture!

Di ko namalayan, ako nalang mag-isang pasaherong di pa nakababa. Tanong nang driver, "Miss saan ka?" Sagot ko, "Dyan lang po sa me Robinsons." Pero sana sinabi ko nalang, "Manong, itabi mo na lang bababa na ako." (ggggrrrrrrr)

Lang hiya! Parang aagawin ko na ang Rubik's nang makita ko... sa bandang kanan... mga ilaw... Robinsons na ako! Sa wakas! Salvation!

Haaay! Sinilip ko sa huling pagkakataon ang mamang nagru-Rubik's. Tsk, Tsk. Maha-habang kalbaryo pa ang tatahakin n'ya. Pero... ako?

Bababa na! Tenkyu at bow na lang sa kanya!


At para sa inyong mala-adik na rin sa Rubiks... dito kayo pumunta: http://www.rubiks.com/